When does it hit you?

When do you fully realize "this is my child"? Whether it is a child through adoption or by birth, does it take a while? Do you feel "it" when you first hold them? When you first see their picture? I've been staring at her picture for a week now but I think it hit me yesterday when I saw the picture with Rosa. I counted ten fingers (I couldn't see her toes) and started to cry. That is my daughter. I still haven't been calling her by name. She's "the baby". Because she's been "the baby" for over nine years. I looked at a picture of Rosa with another baby from Los Pisingos when he was adopted back in April and cried. This woman did so much for so many children in Colombia and families all over. I wonder if she knew the magnitude of my appreciation, as well as that of many others.

Luann told me yesterday the medical tests would cost $250 and wanted to know if we still wanted to proceed. I'm a little disappointed because I thought they would proceed after our conversation on Tuesday but I suppose she needed to ask about the cost. So I doubt the MRI has even been done. We decided that, at this point, there's no way we could say no, so on Monday we are going to officially accept the referral. I already have our visa packet and have sent in the form to the state to be apostilled. So we aren't too far behind the Anderson's, who actually heard AFTER we did. We're hoping to fly out on the 8th, the same day that they are. We will only be there with the Springman's for a few weeks but I think it will be great to be there with two other SD families.

I've washed all the baby clothes and started organizing what I'm going to take. She is just getting into 3-6 month clothes and will hopefully be in them for a while. So between getting ready to go and unpacking our house, we've had a busy day. We were supposed to go to a wedding in Highmore tonight but just didn't feel that we should take the time away. As I've said before, so much to do, so little time.

Yesterday was my niece, Hailey's 11th birthday. She is the youngest grandchild so there will be quite an age difference. Maybe my niece, Katie, that just got married...she's 22...will have a baby soon so Murphy will have a cousin that's close to her age. Otherwise, Christy better get in gear! :)

I hope all of you know how much we appreciate your support. We've had emails, cards, hugs, well wishes, gifts...so much to be thankful for. I have a big "love ya all" shout out to my Internet friends. Most of these are adoptive parents; quite a few whose children were born (or will be born) in Colombia. This is such an awesome experience and these people know exactly what we're feeling, thinking, and preparing for.

I have to show you the family I married into:



I could let you think he dresses like this all the time but I suppose I should tell you it was homecoming. Nice, Shawn. Really nice!